I promised myself 3 months ago, this time, everything would be fine, this time, I'll show the world what I've got, I'm not just capable of getting Us, or high Es, I can do more, I can, I can. &, I'm going to pronounce every letter grade clearly, with pride. But. Why. Not.

I'm so angry with myself I'm just controlling not to smash up my file pencil box whatever that is in my reach.

Why?

I keep telling myself to hold on, to continue on. Why can't I do it when so many others can? Why is everything not paying off, not even a teeny weeny bit? Why? Are you always looking at that A, on someone's script? And not on my own?

Why? Why.

Why?